Traveling far is always something I dread, when ever I know it's gonna be more than a few hours to the journey's end. This past weekend was no exception. We stopped at a roadside park just over the Alabama border. There were plenty of empty stalls. I sat down far away from anyone.
Naturally,Sister Mary Elephant came waddling in. Of course she walked into the stall next to mine, and immediately started complaining about the smell. Do you ever wonder why people choose to go to the bathroom next to someone unless they have too? I always try to avoid the crowd, when I'm gonna pull my pants down.
Anyway, she waddles in, throws a pile on the floor. As she slammed the stall door, my door bursts wide open. Lovely, I have one hand on my bag while the other hand is wiping the neck of my bag out. Quickly, I throw one foot up, before I am totally exposed to the four winds. (What a balancing act!) Quickly, I'm trying to finish, before anyone else walks in. Just about that time Sister Mary Elephant lets out this curdling, "Owee!"diarrhea of the nastiest kind sprays all over the floor. Now I'm really trying to get out of there. The smell is overwhelming and splattering.
As I exit, I was so tempted to give it that extra hard shove, so her door might fling open, but I didn't. I heard her again, "That damn colon cancer is such a b*#ch!" That poor lady was really suffering, bless her heart.
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